Monkey Dust
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Template:Infobox British television
Monkey Dust is an animated TV series that satirises the darker side of life in the United Kingdom. It deals with taboo subjects and has drawn controversy for its portrayal of murderers, paedophiles and single parents. It is often described as a "darker" version of Little Britain (a more mainstream British satire, ridiculing lesser controversies such as transvestitism and homosexuality). The first episode was aired on BBC Three on February 9, 2003 and there have been three series to date – the third began airing on January 4, 2005.
Each episode features animation by several different companies, but is linked by recurring themes and jokes, and by seamless transitions between sketches. The episodes are untitled but instead are known by the characters introduced or the one-off sketches included. The principal writers and creators of the series were Harry Thompson and Shaun Pye, although other contributors are responsible for a significant proportion of the work; sometimes collaborating with Thompson and/or Pye; sometimes contributing fully-formed sketches to the show. Contemporary worries about Child Protection following the Soham Murders lead to a number of characters and skits being eliminated. A short overview of the main characters, called a nocturne, set in the various characters' bedrooms with no dialogue and a depressing accompanying song, usually precedes the final section.
The animation goes alongside contemporary music which helps the scenes to flow, with numerous songs by Goldfrapp and introduction music by Eels ("That's Not Really Funny" from Souljacker). The inclusion of music from Goldfrapp during the first series would have pre-dated the commercial release of their debut album, but production on the series took so long that by the time of airing, Goldfrapp were about to release their second album and the songs included in Monkey Dust were fairly well-known. Thompson and Pye comment on this in the Series 1 DVD commentary.
On 8 November 2004, the first series of Monkey Dust was released in the UK on DVD. Several musical substitutions had to be made from the television airing (where the BBC is allowed to play any commercial release without permission), as artists such as Cliff Richard and David Gray would not allow their work to be used on the DVD. Cover versions of the original songs were used instead.
Interestingly, only the first series of Monkey Dust was commercially released on DVD. The second and third were only broadcast on BBC Two and BBC Three, and later distributed (without profit) on legal bittorrent sites such as UKNova. It has been speculated that due to growing controversy in Britain regarding issues such as terrorism and paedophilia (particularly in wake of events such as the 7 July 2005 London bombings), people were reluctant to release it with its current '15' rating. A more official explanation was that it was out of respect for creator Harry Thompson's suffering through a terminal illness, although this does not explain why there are still no plans for release following Mr Thompson's death.
Characters
The show is based on regular returning characters, along with one-time sketches.
Series one
Labia
A consultancy company which is very morally dubious opens several episodes. The company charges large amounts of money to rebrand companies and other things, e. g. renaming cancer as "Closure" and advertising it as an attractive end-of-life option. The man who invents their new brand names is an international adventurer who looks like Lord Byron. The company's offices are in the shape of their logo, just like the former NatWest Tower (Tower 42).
Liar Clive
Each episode Clive returns home late, and when questioned by his wife as to his previous whereabouts his excuses turn into plots of well-known fiction (for example The Lord of the Rings or Dune) before revealing the truth, usually something degrading, like having fellated a monkey. He is drawn with an overly-tall head, attributed to a drawing mistake.
Ivan Dobsky
Ivan Dobsky is a notorious criminal, known as "the Meat-Safe Murderer", held in custody in a high-security prison. Dobsky has the mental age of a four year old child. Despite his repeated protests that he "never done it" he was convicted for killing a typist at a meat-safe in 1974 by strangling her with a pair of ladies' pants.
Released and pardoned from H.M. Crowmarsh Prison each week, he is a throw-back to the seventies and joyfully rides out of jail only to find the world has changed, and he really preferred prison to the point he ends up murdering someone by the end of the show in order to be incarcerated. He'll never let "Mr Hoppy", his space hopper, leave his side. Mr. Hoppy sometimes seems to have a mind of his own, and may even be the real murderer - assuming that his murderous tendencies are not in fact a fabrication of Dobsky's own insanity. In the second series Ivan marries a prison visitor who "Mr Hoppy" then murders. He also has the voice of an angel, and speaks in a soft flowing Carlisle accent. Many celebrities have campaigned to free Ivan from prison, including Brad Pitt (hired to play Ivan in a Hollywood movie), Bono and Nelson Mandela.
David Baddiel
The famous comedian put upon to perform numerous tasks because, as a famous comedian he is just as qualified as a trained professional. Such tasks include rescuing a child trapped underneath the wheels of a car or piloting a space shuttle.
He is played by himself, and in real life is married to Morwenna Banks who provides voices for several of the characters in the show.
Daisy Harris press conference
A bumbling police force investigating a young girl's murder appear alongside her family in a seemingly endless series of televised press conferences, but are unable to spot her step-father's obvious guilt or mother's ignorance of the fact.
Divorced dad (with Timmy)
Timmy usually lives with his mother and Roger, his mother's new boyfriend. Each week Timmy comes to visit his father but always just talks about what Roger has done for him. The dad doesn't feel that he can impress him and ends up committing suicide each episode, but as he goes off to kill himself, Timmy always explains how Roger can never compare to his real dad. Roger remains an unseen character until episode 5, when Timmy shows his father a photo of him - revealing that he looks like an older version of Timmy himself. Realising the truth, Timmy's father decides not to kill himself but to be a good father to Timmy anyway. In the last episode featuring these characters (during season two), the divorced dad goes to stay with Timmy and the mother for the weekend at their house in a rough area but, on seeing that Timmy has begun to dress, talk and act like a yob in order to fit in with the local kids, the father commits suicide for the final time out of sheer desperation.
Chat room pervert
A paedophile attempts to lure children via a chat room, but usually ends up giving the game away – for instance, by correcting the child's grammar. When he eventually manages to arrange a meeting with one of his online friends, the "child" turns out to be another elderly pervert who preys on children in chat rooms.
The Clubbers
A group of pseudo-intellectuals make increasingly pretentious statements about art, culture and life in general. This usually leads to their being barred from clubs and restaurants (due to a "no wankers" policy), or just beaten up.
One of 'The Clubbers' is referred to in the script by the moniker 'Scotch Twat'.
Geoff the first-time cottager
Geoff is a wimpy bespectacled office worker who constantly tries to pluck up the courage to fellate strange men in toilets or parks, but is always thwarted somehow, and when he finally succeeds, he finds that he doesn't really like it. In one scene, Geoff attends an evening class in cottaging for beginners at his local college, in which he enters the classroom proudly announcing to the class that he wants to be a cottager, only to be told that the class is for Bengali literature. When Geoff visits Rio de Janeiro for the Carnival, he attempts to perform fellatio on a man dressed as a traffic policeman. The man tells him in Portuguese that he really is a traffic cop (Geoff looks through his phrasebook) and beats him savagely.
The yuppies
A group of middle class friends who are constantly holding very dull dinner parties, until a bizarre or out of the ordinary event happens to liven it up (eg. in one episode a guest suddenly suggests playing Russian roulette and in the next scene one of the guests has been shot in the head; in another a couple are talking about how they had children via IVF using eggs and sperm donated by athletes and geniuses, at which point the children come downstairs and blow their parents' heads off with telekinesis)
Sven-Göran Eriksson
A television shows a stock crowd scene from history or nature, for example, a herd of stampeding wildebeest, and a voice-over says 'And of course, no surprise to see England manager Sven-Göran Eriksson in the crowd'; a reference to his ubiquitous appearances at football matches throughout the UK at the time.
The classically-trained actor
A man who constantly speaks in the emotionless, non-committal style of a TV voice-over, including during sex, in the crowd at a football match, when giving a speech at a friend's funeral and other times when it is normal to talk in an emotional manner. Whenever slighted, he notes that he is a classically-trained actor.
Theme pub
A man walks into his local which although he is the only patron has on each occasion been transformed by orders of "the brewery". Themes include Crack House and S&M bar. One one occasion, he enters the pub to be told by a barman in an absurd leprechaun outfit that it is now an "Oirish pub". When he asks what happened to the previous barman, who was Irish, he is told that he wasn't "Oirish" enough.
Kelly, work experience girl
A very dim teenage girl with no understanding of office work, she says "I'm Kelly, I'm on work experience" whenever approached. She is totally inept: if you ask her to file some papers, she might photocopy a kettle or staple a mousemat to her foot.
Series two
Jon Swoon
TV presenter/lawyer who tries to have Ivan Dobsky released from prison. He ends up murdered by Dobsky's security robotic arm. Hosts a programme called Beyond Reasonable Doubt.
Omar, Abdul and Shafiq, the useless terrorists
A fanatical Islamic terrorist recruits two teenage boys to carry out suicide bombings in the name of Allah, but the plans always fail. They are avid supporters of West Bromwich Albion F.C. and live in Birmingham. They often sit in the kitchen of one of the teenagers' homes to discuss their plans, as the boy's mother brings them drinks and snacks, seemingly completely oblivious to what they are talking about. The fanatical nature of their intentions and theology is somewhat undermined by their rather mundane mindset. In the conclusion of Series 3, the older terrorist sends the two young boys to Iraq, while staying in the UK himself because "he couldn't change his dental appointment" but goes down the pub instead. The boys complain that terrorist training is "worse than PE" but are delighted to meet a fellow West Bromwich fan among the new recruits, before being captured and imprisoned by American troops ("This is the best holiday I've ever had!")
Abu the illegal immigrant
An illegal immigrant who is never able to see the bad side of living in Britain, and remains eternally optimistic however dire his situation becomes. He often writes gushing letters to his family in India about how wonderful his new life in Britain is (despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary), and even chooses a strip club as the ideal place to look for a girlfriend.
Essex man and London man
Two large men discuss the relative merits of Essex and London. This usually ends with them shouting "ESSEX!" and "LONDON!" at each other.
"Your hair looks nice"
Girlfriend is having her hair done. Boyfriend tries to remember to compliment her on her new style, but is always distracted by some extraordinary event such as an alien invasion. By the time Girlfriend arrives, all evidence of the strange event has disappeared, and Girlfriend thinks the speechless Boyfriend just doesn't care.
The paedofinder general
A parody of the film Witchfinder General. An ominous character who executes alleged paedophiles on dubious evidence, e.g. a swimming pool attendant whose Speedo trunks are mis-read as Peedo is dissolved in acid, and he attacks the cast of a production of Fiddler On The Roof because he thinks it's "Kiddy Fiddler On The Roof". He admits to looking at online child pornography himself, but claims that "it's for research". He appeared in a few skits in the first episode of season two and returned as a regular character in season three. Much of the humour is based on both the endemic waves of moral panic about paedophilia, and the profound stupidity of the paedofinder general himself.
Mail order bride man
A grotesquely fat middle-aged man with a quiff, sideburns and poor personal hygiene greets his Thai mail order bride who turns out to be beautiful, intelligent, adoring of him and completely impervious to his disgusting lifestyle. Each episode, when he demands sex and she refuses because she wants their love to grow stronger by waiting, he kicks her out.
Nazi grandfather
An elderly man who always has to attend a formal occasion such as a wedding or court hearing, but finds he has nothing left to wear except his Nazi coat with a swastika armband, inevitably leading to trouble (for example at a wedding or a court case).
Relationship-seeking girl
A girl in a bar walks over to a handsome man and starts dreaming of the future. She imagines a bleak future, slaps the man and walks away.
Series three
Fran Chappell
An ordinary mother who uses her daughter's disappearance as the springboard to launch a showbiz career. When the girl comes back Fran is caught up in her career and pays her £100 to leave again.
Noodles
Probably inspired by Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Noodles is a laboratory rabbit who can survive all manner of horrific medical experiments because he is only a toon. In the final episode he turns the tables on the researchers by dropping an anvil on their heads in true cartoon fashion.
Broody woman
A woman in denial that she wants a child despite evidence to the contrary, such as dressing kittens in baby clothes and pushing them around in a pram.
Prime Minister
A caricature of Tony Blair who makes a speech in front of the American flag, making ludicrous promises such as "Magic beans for every family" as well as more satirical ones ("Post to be delivered on time").
Saint Stephen's Hospital
A very badly run hospital highlighting all the main criticisms about the British National Health Service. Its many problems include a "superbug" that can be seen visibly travelling along the corridors, patients transported in a supermarket trolley, ants invading, organs stolen from recently deceased patients, and an ultrasound scan of a pregnant woman that reveals that her baby is spraying graffiti in the womb.
Mr and Mrs Daily Mail
A husband and wife constantly interrupted by the noise of 'kids from the flats', who are performing such absurd acts as disproving the theory of gravity, and coaxing Vin Diesel to fight a bear.
Awards
- 2003: International Student Jury Award (Banff Rockies Awards)
- 2004: Best Multichannel Programme (Broadcast Awards)
- 2004: Best Comedy (British Animation Awards)
Quotations
"By the power vested in me by that bloke I met in the pub - who said he knew for definite - I now pronounce you...a paedophile" — Paedo-Finder General
"99?! That's like 69 but thirty worse!"— Paedo-Finder General
"All gays are paedophiles. It is written in stone. On the wall behind the bus shelter, where I wrote it"— Paedo-Finder General
"I never done it! I only said I done it so they'd take the rat out of my anus!" — Ivan Dobsky
"Karen Carpenter, she's my favourite! I bet she's old and fat now."— Ivan Dobsky
"Hello, I'm the Meatsafe Murderer, only I never done it see, and two nice men called D and A know I didn't do it and they told everyone. Can I have a quarter of a pound of cola cubes?"— Ivan Dobsky
"... and that, darling, is what really happened"— Liar Clive
"I CAN suck off a complete stranger in a public toilet!"— Heard on a motivational self - hypnosis tape that Jeff the first time cottager listens to
"As a famous comedian, I resent the implication that I'm any less qualified than a fully trained professional"— David Baddiel
"Now is the time to be strong in our resolve. It must be - Del Boy" — The useless terrorists discuss who to vote for in a poll of favourite TV characters, as MI5 spies listen in from outside