Small Soldiers

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de:Small Soldiers fr:Small Soldiers Template:Infobox Film Small Soldiers (1998) is an action/science-fiction film, directed by Joe Dante.

Contents

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Plot summary

The film's setting is New Braunfels, Texas during the Oktoberfest. The movie is about action toys that begin a real war against each other, as a result of being inadvertently equipped with intelligent military computer chips.

Tagline: The few, the proud, and the small. "we are the commando elite, everything else is, just a toy."

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Cast

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Story

Spoiler warning: Plot and/or ending details follow.

At the beginning of the film toymaker, Heartland Playsystems is acquired by the multinational conglomerate Globotech Industries, which is expanding from manufacturing war material into more profitable consumer markets. Everyone at Heartland is fired except for two employees:a slick executive named Larry Benson (Jay Mohr) and the not so charismatic scientist Irwin Wayfair (David Cross), the two men responsible for developing the most popular toy in Heartland's history. Globotech CEO Gil Mars (Denis Leary), pays a visit to Heartland to meet with Larry and Irwin concerning their newest projects.

Irwin offers up the Gorgonites, peaceful aliens whose mission is to gather information about Earth, prompting children to learn with them. Mars is not sold on the idea of educational toys, so Larry presents the Commando Elite, a special task force of action figures. Larry's video presentation is well-done, with the soldiers bursting out of their packaging and delivering one-liners, but when asked about this, Larry explains that it's only for show. Mars announces that he wants action figures that are true to their commercials, and charges the pair with the task of developing these new "smart toys". He also wants an enemy for the Commando Elite, and despite Irwin's objections, Mars chooses the ugly-looking Gorgonites. The Gorgonites are subsequently designated to automatically lose any fight with the Commando Elite.

Mars insists on a deadline of three months, half of the usual time needed for product testing, but the sycophantic Larry promises delivery. Larry uses Irwin's password ("Gizmo") and orders surplus military microprocessors ("X 1000") from another division of Globotech without researching their specifications or history. Omitting product testing to save time, the action figures are delivered to market by the deadline for the planned product launch.

Alan Abernathy has been expelled from two schools for playing pranks, though the rumors around his new school say ten. His parents moved to New Braunfels, Texas, hoping to start over. His father, Stuart, owns an unsuccessful toy store that sells no electronic toys or violent action figures. Stuart is going out of town to a small-business seminar and has left Alan in charge, so it is Alan minding the store when a delivery truck arrives. Alan sees the boxes containing the Gorgonites and the Commando Elite, and convinces the truck driver to leave him a complete set of each, thinking that he can sell them before his father returns. The two open the packages and activate the leaders of each side before the truck driver leaves, saying that he will "lose" the delivery paperwork.

Christy Fimple - a girl on whom Alan has a crush and who happens to be his next-door neighbor - arrives at the toy store with her little brother, Timmy, to pick out some toys for his birthday. Timmy wants Major Chip Hazard and Archer, so Alan sets them aside in the storage room. Alan and Christy talk for a few minutes until her jock boyfriend arrives on his motorcycle, and she and her brother leave.

When Alan returns to the storage room, Major Chip Hazard (Commando Elite) has cornered Archer (Gorgonite). Alan, not realizing the toys have been fighting while he's been away, removes the weapon from Hazards' hand and places both action figures back in their respective packaging. Alan sets all of the toys along a wall in the toy store. He then notices that his father's airline ticket has been left in the store, so he hurries home with it. In his room that night, he discovers that Archer has stowed away in his backpack.


During the night, Chip Hazard breaks out of his packaging and activates the rest of the Commando Elite: Butch Meathook, Link Static, Brick Bazooka, Nick Nitro, and Kip Killagan. Hazard gives a rousing speech in front of a flag puzzle (reminiscent of the speech in the movie Patton but using cliches and one-liners from famous speeches and other war movies). The storefront is shown and sounds of a battle can be heard, with the Gorgonites obviously on the losing end.

When Alan arrives at the toy store in the morning, most of the store has been trashed. All he can find of the Gorgonites is a destroyed Troglikhan, and there is no sign of the Commando Elite. Christy shows up shortly thereafter and helps him clean up. They finish just before Alan's father, Stuart, arrives. Christy sneaks Archer out of the store in Alan's backpack. Stuart discovers the broken mast on a toy ship and sends Alan home. Once home, Alan calls the company to complain about the Commandos' actions, but recieves only an indifferent response.

Unknown to Alan, the Commando Elite have been watching the store for any sign of Archer. When Alan rides home on his bicycle, they follow him far enough to find out where he lives. During the night, they lure Archer out of Alan's room by imitating the other Gorgonites, capture him, and proceed to interrogate their prisoner in the kitchen. Luckily, Alan awakens and manages to save Archer and drive off the Commando Elite, mortally wounding Nick Nitro in the process. Since the Commandos were asking Archer where the rest of the Gorgonites were, Archer knows that they were not destroyed in the initial struggle.

Meanwhile, the Commandos regroup in Fimple's garage. Taking Alan's action as an offense, they decide to include him in their list of enemy targets. They begin to convert all the sharp tools and electrical items stored in the garage into makeshift combat vehicles.


Alan visits the toy store in the morning to search for the rest of the Gorgonites. Archer says that "They are doing what they do best. They are hiding." Serendipitously, Alan thinks of looking in the dumpster out back, where they find the rest of the Gorgonites: Ocula, Slamfist, Punch-It, Scratch-It, Insaniac, and Troglikhan. The Gorgonites have even managed to repair Troglikhan by using half of a radio, turning him into Freakenstein. Alan takes all of the Gorgonites home with him.

That evening, the Commando Elite tap the phone lines and find out about Alan and Christy's relationship. The Commandos drug Christy's parents with sleeping pills, then capture Timmy, tie him up, and leave him in a closet. They use Nick Nitro's "X 1000" microchip to animate (in a scene reminiscent of the Frankenstein movies) all of Christy's Gwendy dolls. When Christy arrives home with her boyfriend, the Gwendy dolls quickly capture Christy. Her boyfriend hears her screams and races to rescue her, but quickly runs away after being attacked by the freakish Gwendys and the Commandos.

The Commandos force Christy to make a hostage video that demands that the Gorgonites surrender to them. Alan delivers a cardboard box labeled 'Gorgonites', luring the Commandos out to destroy them, and sneaks in the back way (with the help of Archer) while the enemy is distracted. Alan makes it upstairs before the Commandos discover that the box is a decoy which contains nothing except a cassette recorder playing a tape recording of Gorgonite voices. However, the Gwendy dolls have been left behind to guard the hostage, and a battle ensues in which Alan, Christy and Archer fight off the Gwendy dolls and attempt to escape out a window.

Christy, Alan, and Archer make their escape on Christy's motorcycle while the Commando Elite pursue them on their newly made combat vehicles. The protagonists escape by jumping over a stream while the Commando Elite crash and are destroyed - all but Chip Hazard.

The Abernathys and the Fimples meet at the Abernathy house. Phil Fimple claims that Alan destoryed his house and brainwashed his daughter into thinking that it was a group of toys that attacked the house. Alan and Christy try to explain what happened, but their parent's won't believe them.

Just then, Larry and Irwin arrive on the scene. Alarmed by Alan's call, they have checked out the X-1000 - only to find out that it was one of a series of highly efficient microchips designed for use in guided missiles. These chips were so smart that they could actually learn within their primary programming and thus extend their action horizon. However, they have been rejected by the Defense Department because they were easily disabled by an electromagnetic pulse (EMP).


While all this is happening, Major Chip Hazard is floating down the stream, finally ending up at the local Toy World. Globotech has called for a full recall of the Commando Elite, and Hazard finds a delivery truck full of Commando Elite action figures, which he activates. He threatens the driver and has him drive the truck to the Abernathy house. There, the Commando Elite declare war on the Gorgonites and all of the humans currently in the house, taking the latter for allies of the Gorgonites and thus as enemies.

What follows is a battle to the death between the two sides. The Commandos attack with more makeshift machines, shooting nails, flaming tennis balls, and small fireworks at the house. The humans come up with a plan to destroy the Commando Elite by frying their AI chips with an EMP. Alan heads to the top of an electric pole with a wrench, hoping to connect the transformer and thus set off a pulse. On the way he is harrassed by dozens of Commando Elite including Major Chip Hazard on a small helicopter, but these are taken care of by the Gorgonites, who Archer has convinced to fight. Archer shoots himself up to the transformer and engages Hazard in hand-to-hand combat. Hazard tosses Archer off the pole, but his victory is short-lived; Alan grabs him and puts him between the transformers. At that moment Irwin overloads some of Fimples' appliances, which emits the EMP and shuts down any electrical devices within a certain radius: this includes the Gwendy dolls, the Commando Elite, and (at first believed) the Gorgonites.

Mr. Mars arrives in the morning in his trademark black helicopter. He has his assistant pass out huge cheques to hush things up. Larry is fearful for his job, but Mars proposes that they add a few zeroes to the price of the Commando Elite and sell them to some rebels in Central America.

While cleaning up his back yard, Alan discovers that the Gorgonites have survived by hiding under a fallen satellite dish, shielding them from the pulse emitted by the transformer. They still want to search for their home, Gorgon, and set out on a model ship in a river in Yosemite National Park. Alan is the only one to see them off.

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The Gorgonites

The Gorgonites are the heroes of the film. This team of mutants is programmed to search for the peaceful land of Gorgon. Led by Archer, the Gorgonites have only two options when dealing with the Commando Elite, hide or die, this is hardcoded into their original progrmming. The Gorgonites consist of:

  • Archer: The leader of the Gorgonites. As his name suggests, Archer is armed with a crossbow attached to his left arm. Archer is the bravest of the Gorgonites and convinces the others to fight. He is voiced by Frank Langella.
  • Ocula: A one-eyed insect-like creature who is very shy. Ocula cannot speak like the others, and does not seem to put his only eye in jeopardy. Ocula and Slamfist see a giant one-eyed alien similar to Ocula on television, and Ocula thinks it is a relative. He is voiced by Jim Cummings.
  • Punch-It and Scratch-It: Punch-It and Scratch-It are constant companions. Punch-It resembles a humanoid brontotherium, while Scratch-It looks like an orange legless monster who walks on his hands and sits on Punch-It when travelling.
  • Insaniac: A blue monster who is positively insane. He spins about like the Tasmanian Devil from Looney Tunes and speaks very quickly. He has the personality of a comedian. His weapon is a ball-and-chain.
  • Slamfist: Slamfist, a hunchback, is Archer's best friend. His left hand is replaced by large boulder-like fist. Slamfist is a bit dim-witted, but his fist is powerful.
  • Freakenstein: Originally known as Troglikhan, Freakenstein is a Frankenstein's Monster-like creature. He was disassembled by the Commandos when they wreaked havoc in Alan's toy shop and rebuilt by the Gorgonites with a radio as part of the body.
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Trivia

  • The voices of the Commando Elite, except for Major Chip Hazard, are played by the actors of The Dirty Dozen.
  • The voices of the Gorgonites, except for Archer, are played by the actors of This Is Spinal Tap.
  • When this aired on Cartoon Network for the first time, it was also the first time any TV show or movie on the network, other than on the Adult Swim program, that the word "ass" was said.
  • Kirsten Dunst is one year older than Gregory Smith.
  • The scene where Nick Nitro is fataly wounded and says "its just a flesh wound" is possibly a reference to the black knight scene from Monty Python And The Holy Grail.
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External links

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